My 30’s were pretty great. I entered my 30’s with a 6 month old daughter, celebrated my 31st birthday with the news I was expecting a second child. I finished off pastoring and entered into a role where I was speaking in front of churches and crowds. For 2.5 years we were debt-free. We moved from the city to a village, Jeff and I both stepped out of ministry positions and into other careers and then I capped off my 30’s with one of the most challenging and life changing years of my life.
I have a husband whom I love more than when I married him 15 years ago. Jeff is a partner to me in every sense of the word and I am beyond grateful for his steady, loving presence in my life. His ability to make me laugh and his tenderness with our girls can leave me breathless. Jeff believes in me when I don’t believe in myself and has always supported me in my work and ministry even if it is uncomfortable for him. Probably most importantly, he is the reason I have two of my greatest accomplishments in life, KJ and Bear.
My beautiful girls. So utterly different, yet so similar. They are complete blends of us both, which at times often delight and frustrate me. They have taught me more than I can ever put into words. If I had to choose one lesson, it would be the lesson of love. Unconditional, unwavering love that overwhelms me at times. We have upended their lives this past year and it has been hard. Yet, I have seen a resilience and a spirit of adaptability that has risen to the surface and has deepened our bond as a family and as people of faith. If I do nothing else of merit in this world, my daily prayer is that I parent these unique spirits well.
I have more gray hair now. I am finally becoming comfortable with who I am. I wear what I want and I cut my hair short. I value the opinion of people who love me and am learning to care less what others think. I am learning to lean into my strengths and acknowledge my weaknesses. My faith sustains me. My body is fit and strong. I have friends who love me and whom I love. I have my biological family and my married into family who love and support me and my little family even when we do crazy things like move to Camden.
I am content.
And that may be the greatest gift to enter this new decade.